I feel risks are riskier when you don’t take them.
Some risks: choosing to not breath, choosing to not eat, choosing to not have your bath, choosing to not live, etc.
These are risks but if you don’t take them, no one will do that for you.
Risks you’ve got to take for yourself because everyone else is pretty taken (by themselves) and occupied.
Like, go out there and be strong for yourself. Pretty basic but not as basic as it pans out when written.
To not take these risks would be looking at your coffin from the great beyond.
Looking at ulcer damaging your intestines and all.
Smelling the stench of your body, oozing like an untended carcass.
Watching yourself die.
These sort of consequences: not too pretty…
…because the consequences are often more bad ass in uppercase BAD ASS.
AH! MEMORY LANE:
I remember when I lost my best friend. One of, actually. We were close and bonded when she was still alive – my grandma.
The impact of the news unnerved me and I can still see my 2014 self sliding down the wall as the news hit my auditory nerves; I couldn’t concentrate at work.
At the time, I was doing a one year stint with the Enugu State Economic Planning Commission (ESEPC), this stint we call NYSC – which I see as a waste of precious year. Keep your gospel of “One Nigeria” in your wardrobe for now! We’ll preach it later. 🙂
I was down all through the night – on a Wednesday. I cried, then I asked why – to God. Then, I cried again and talked with the walls (the walls were my closest friends then).
The next morning, I got to work by 10am or 11am (I was never punctual) and signed out by 2pm or so. The head henchman was not around and I couldn’t stay any further; took permission from the second-in-charge and left.
But not informing him was risky to my stay in Enugu. Very risky because he could get all angry and stuff.
The next day, I travelled to the village to connect with my roots (my grandma’s spirit which I believed was still somewhere around the vicinity of the village).
Stayed as much as three weeks, with family and healed a smidgen.
BACK TO ESEPC:
When I came back, I got a query from the head who was so pissed off with me. Like, mad pissed. He threatened to MAKE me get an extension; I didn’t care about that – not remotely or non-remotely. I was already thinking how I’d turn the extension (if it ever came around) to my favour. Got no chill for bad energy!
I was more concerned about, “What if I had been too afraid to take permission from the second-in-charge and go home to heal my heart just because of an extension? What if?”
I wrote my reply to the query. Got no extension. Got no nothing.
Got freedom: the risk of leaving even without the presence of the head paid off.
What if I had let fear creep in and not go home to ‘seemingly say goodbye’ to my loved one. I’d be living with that for a very long time just because I was afraid to step out and say, “Okay, fine. If it goes bad, I’ll bear the consequences. Vice versa!”