Few years ago, at this time, I’d have psyched myself that, “Christmas is in the villa.” It made sense: Playing football, gaming and stuff.
It lost its allure, appeal and attraction to me. I just realized perhaps I’ve got to stay away for two or three years. From the village. Away from the objects of memories.
This is almost year 1. I don’t plan visiting home (the village) till 2017/2018. I’ll be much older then. It’s how I often get to heal: Growing up.
So, today is 10th December, 2015. Last year this time it was 10th December, 2014.
Today is happy. Last year (few hours from now), I was sitting on the floor, staring into oblivion, creating pools of tears hoping it’s not true. But it’s true.
I lost one of my best friends. She was my best friend from when I was few minutes or hours old till she died in December, 2014.Last night, I remembered the hugs. Click To Tweet
Depression. More depression. Lack of focus and its cousins.
I quit going to work (NYSC ish); the oga threatened me with an extension and gave a query of about four sentences. I replied with two pages. They read the reply. They were tired and confused why I couldn’t reply with four sentences or just few more. They apologized.
I paid no mind to the extension or stuff. I never liked NYSC. Actually, at heart, I evilly dared an extension to be given to me.
I remember how she took me to the market and other places. Then, I grew up, grew taller and whenever I came home to the village, the hug was always great and sincere.
This kind of hugs, I could count just few people I’ve ever gotten such from till date.
Unique. Sincere. Loving. From the depth!
Last night, I remembered the hugs. And I thought about the tattoo of her I wanted sketching on my body. I’ve not forgotten the tattoo; a tiny piece of me still wants to do the sketch.
I like keeping my loved ones close to my heart and also, remembering them through familiar objects.
P.S: This isn’t a pity party. Don’t sorry me up. She died exactly 365 days ago and I’d like to keep it that way.